My original title for this post was Losing Your Cool because of something that happened to me today. However, when I began to reflect on today's event it reminded me of something Christian are always told, which is to be careful of your actions because you never know who's watching. Words similar to that are all over the bible as well (when I find a scripture, I will put it in this post). You never know when someone may call you out for being a Christian because your behavior doesn't reflect it.
This morning I was talking with someone about a situation that had occurred between people we know and how I got the wrong end of the stick in the matter. I was telling someone how I truly felt about the matter and the next thing I know I'd upset myself and said a swear word in the process. After I said the word of choice, I covered my mouth and told the person sorry for speaking that way especially about a situation as petty as this. The person just laughed at me and said, 'and you're a Christian.' The only thing I could say was, 'I know'. I quickly made a joke and changed the subject, but that moment stayed with me all day. Just that quick I forgot I was a Christian and had a non-Christian point it out to me. Just that quick.
Today's event made me think of actors and actresses. When the director yells 'action', you have to immediately get into character and cannot break until the director yells 'cut'. Well today reminded me that being a Christian is a similar experience except there is no on or off button for it and God never yells cut. My Christianity has to be my life 24/7. My beliefs have to be my beliefs no matter where I go and my actions have to reflect those beliefs.
This being 'on' all the time wouldn't sound so hard if it wasn't for the bible being such a big book! If it were a pamphlet, I could probably memorize it and live by it with no problem. The bible, however, is like the script of a one-woman show on Broadway. It is just you and the living word and you have to know every word and there is no room for error. An actress in a one-woman show cannot blame the actors if she messes up because there are no other actors. You are accountable for the performance. Today and everyday, I am accountable to God and others know it. Needless to say, I felt and still feel ashamed of myself for such a public mess up, but it was a good lesson for me and I hope for you as well. Remember God in everything and keep him close. Although I listened to Christian music on the way to work, I didn't have on my full armor of God like I should have. I apparently left some important pieces at home like a muzzle.
When this event occurred, my first thought was to share it with you because I wanted you to see that you're not going to be a perfect Christian everyday. This blog is in no way a How To Manual from someone who knows 'how to' be a proper Christian. I just want you to learn from me. If you don't want to pick up the bible, I'll pick it up for you and share what I'm learning. Most importantly, if I make a mistake, I want to share it with you so if by chance you made the same mistake today you won't feel like the worst person in the world. That's not to excuse the behavior. Please pray and ask God to correct your mind and heart for the next time. But I want us to be able to lift each other in pray and how will you know what to pray for me if I only tell you the good stuff. I have had an issue with my language for a long time and I want to improve in this area. As a person who is truly sorry, I hope not to have a blog entry like this again, but if I do, it just means I wasn't on and that for some reason, I forgot that God's lights and camera are on my everyday and he watches every one of my actions.
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Good blog today Jennie! More importantly it is an inside job. What happens on the inside will eventually come out on the outside. I also have my days when I use choice words and not just outwardly, but inwardly. Now lately I have been asking God for change. Major change! I don't want the same anything anymore. I know God can do it. Life is too precious, and God's plan to awesome to be stuck with "junk". Don't get hung up on the "part", but on the heart. It is truly and inside job.
ReplyDeleteOnce again, preaching to the choir. I need to police myself more often and not just when I'm teaching. There is always a tactful way to say/express things.
ReplyDeleteShake it off, you've learned your lessons. Livin' right is a daily fight against principalities. We start at square one every morning hoping to have made more positive, progressive steps than backward steps, if any, by the end of the day. Armor up!