A few months ago, I started seeing a new counselor. There was nothing wrong with my old one. I just felt it was time to see someone else. After the first session, I knew I made a good choice. The only problem is our schedules conflict a lot and he’s very popular so every visit, which is usually once every 4-6 weeks, has to count just as much. Well, tonight he had to cancel due to a family emergency. I understand, considering last week I had my own family emergency to deal with. But I was looking forward to tonight because of the homework assignment we were going to discuss tonight.
The two main reason for going to counseling are one, to work on being content in who I am (i.e., my depression). And two, I wanted to examine my romantic relationships. For my homework assignment, my counselor wanted to write about every relationship I’ve had since the age of 20. I had to write about why I was initially attracted to the person, why I stayed as long as I did, and what finally broke up the relationship. Although I have spoken and written about my relationships for those classes I mentioned, I don’t think I ever had to write about them all at the same time. Also, I didn’t have the hindsight of 30 when I examined them before.
Like a good student, I did the homework last night. I took one of my many notebooks and wrote a few paragraphs on each of the five guys I’ve had relationships with since 20. I’m not going to share what I wrote about; if that’s the cliffhanger you were waiting for. What I will share is that I can honestly say I do not want any of those men back. Not because they’re bad people. I just know those relationships ended for a reason. Two of the men are happily married and fathers now and I would hate to have been tied to one of them still and they miss the life they were supposed to have.
The man I really want back is God. I miss my fire for God. The year I started this blog was the same year I read the entire bible. So God and I were really connecting. Even days I had no idea what I read, I still felt that God knew my heart and I was feeling Him move around in mine. A few weeks ago, I went to a watch night service at church, where I had the opportunity to praise God anyway that I want. For some of the time, I just sat there and read my bible because that’s how I bonded with God to begin. But in my prayers and cries that night, I realized how much I missed God. I began to open up my thoughts to him again. I remembered that He is the best friend I could possibly have. I remembered that I could come back to Him at anytime and He wouldn’t judge nor deny me. That night I felt loved.
Within the past few weeks, I haven’t opened myself up to God like I did that night. I need to. There are so many things I want to tell him. There are so many things I need to see about myself and others and right now, my eyes are not working right. I need to thank him more than I did that my dad’s health is better and that my family was able to pull together in a time of trouble. I need to be a woman of action instead of complaint. The last two weeks have taught who really has my back and who will truly never let me down. I pray that I never have to write about my break up with God.
Posts
Yeah, I feel you. I tripped out when I cried a couple of weeks ago and found myself telling Jesus that I missed Him.
ReplyDeleteI don't know why I said it.
I don't get it. How can you miss someone who's always there? Someone who's testing you day-in and day-out? Distraction's the price of living in His name, so pay it with a smile. Anyone who sits around missing/praising Him 365 days of the yeaar isn't doing much.
ReplyDelete(Nice post by the way. The last few paragraphs threw me.)
I WANT MY EX BOYFRIEND BACK
ReplyDeleteI read a testimony online about Dr Love spell caster solution job well done drlovespellcastersolution@gmail.com tel: +2348038096203 many ladies and gentlemen they are sharing their Love story on how Dr Love Solution helped them get an ex-husband or ex-wife come back to their life back again between 48 hrs then i decide to give Dr Love a try about my ex husband Raymond because My husband recently divorced me and states he fell out of love with me because he is now "dating" other young girls but ever since we divorced i find out i still love my ex-husband very much and my heart aches every single day .
at first i don't believe i could ever get Raymond back and remarried again but Dr Love make my dream come true and you are my hero because you make me smile and happy again .Thanks so much Dr Love
Regards
Stella
My name is Jennifer martins, from USA I never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once when i went to Africa in February this year on a business summit. I meant a man who’s name is DR.madurai he is really powerful and could help cast spells to bring back one’s gone, lost, misbehaving lover and magic money spell or spell for a good job or luck spell .I’m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 6years. I really loved him, but his mother was against us and he had no good paying job. So when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him. At first i was undecided, skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. And in 7 days when i returned to usa, my boyfriend (now husband) called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married. I didn’t believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do. Well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid, and my husband also got the new job and our lives became much better. His email is maduraitemple@yahoo.com :or call +2347067607073
ReplyDeleteAfter being in relationship for for many years,my husband broke up
ReplyDeletewith me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in
vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I
begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I
explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should
rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring
him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no
choice than to try it, I emailed the spell caster, and he told me there
was no problem that everything will be okay before seven days, that my
ex will return to me before seven days, he cast the spell and
surprisingly in the six day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I
was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was
so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to
him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that
was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have
made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I
would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only
real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and
who is different from all the other ones out there.So friends my advise is if you have such problem you can email him on (druduehilovespell@gmail.com) or call him with +2348068540264.. . Sir i am indeed grateful for the help, i will forever recommend my friends to you.