I Like You, Too. For Nichelle

My sisters and I joke often that if we weren't related to one another, would we even be friends? Once upon a time I could honestly say that about my oldest sister. My oldest sister and I are 13 years apart, so having something in common from the start was going to be hard. It's hard to believe looking back that her presence was one of the main ones I adored as a child. I thought she was cool, stylish, and fun. I remember her as a teenager loving Prince and make-up. Around the age of five, I saw my sister go off to college and that's were the separation really began. When she would come home, I didn't feel like I knew her and a few years later when she joined the Army and went to Germany, it was more like "oldest sister, who?" My middle sister became my oldest and only sister and I was fine with that.

Fast forward to the year I turned 16 and thought the world was mine! It was only me at home with my parents. And most importantly, my parents were mine and also their money (just being real, Mommy and Daddy). The money being for me to get my hair and nails done and maybe a few outfits. But as luck would have it, my sister moved home with two young children, the youngest being three months old. And well, life began to suck. My parents didn't have money. Instead, they (and me) had family responsibilities. My room became a refugee. And well, I became more of a sister to my nieces than aunt because now I was in charge of being there for them sometimes just like my sister with me years earlier. And actually, I didn't mind that too much because even as a spoiled teen, I knew inside the blessing it was to watch them grow up. I was there when my youngest niece took her first step. I even remember one of the first times she peed in the potty. It was magical, but even with this magic, I had a sister that I couldn't stand and couldn't stand me. Mutual non-magic!

Let's fast forward to adult years. Yeah, we still had our moments and a time period we couldn't stand each other and argued. But one day, moment, time, I still don't know til this day, something clicked over. I think it was when we started to have more in common, like books, TV shows, music, thoughts on life, etc. We became friends. There was a point to when I talked about her and didn't make a stink face. I smiled and when my friends told me how cool they thought she was, I mostly agreed with.

This past weekend was my sister and her family's last weekend in our hometown of Pittsburgh. She and her family are moving to Denver where her husband got a new job. I had to say goodbye to my sister. I hugged her and cried. I cried because like every human being, you think of all things you did wrong by that person than right. I apologized for being difficult and thanked her for not giving up on us being an us and also letting me have a big role in her girls' lives. I can honestly say that even when we didn't talk, she never withheld the girls from me and I appreciated that. When she hugged me back, she said that it was okay I was difficult because we are 13 years apart after all. She also said, "I like you". I told her I liked her too and well, cried more! And I am soooo grateful to God she finally left Pittsburgh at a time when we did like each other. I couldn't imagine her leaving four-five plus years ago, when our relationship wasn't as strong. That wouldn't have been good. In fact, that would have given me more of a reason to not try to know her. But now I have peace with her and our relationship. On Saturday, I was able to say goodbye to my friend, not just my sister.